I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
‘Why? Just, why? Why did I have to love him? Why did he have to die? Why can’t I forget him? Its like he’s here, walking beside me, reminding me I failed him’. Harry Potter thinks one day on his way to the top of the castle, a place he frequently visits to get away from the bustle of life.
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
‘It’s been three years, and I still can’t forget. Every time I even try to breathe I remember how he can’t because he’s dead.’ Harry is once again on the roof of the castle.
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
'I can’t even bring myself to love anymore. I miss you so much. All the time we wept together, laying late into the night just offering comfort to each other. You never realized it but I loved you so much more than just a friend. Maybe we’ll be together soon my sweet.’ Harry thinks as he looks out over the grounds, crying silent tears.
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
‘You always caught my eye. No matter what you were doing you were an unending light in the darkness of my life. You were always afraid of your families past, now I am bound by it. I can never forget your face the night I accepted the potion that would bond our magic cores. I once dreamed that we would be able to bond in ways more than simply backup magic sources to each other. Your voice was always music to my ears. Without it I’m slowly going mad with need and sadness.’ Harry sits with his legs dangling over the edge of the castle wistfully thinking over the last few years of his life.
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
‘I can’t stand to be around our old friends at length any longer. To see them and their smiling faces without you by my side is like salt in my wounds. It makes me think of what we may have had. It has been 5 years now my love. I’m not sure how much longer they can keep me going.’
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
‘Now I see you face everywhere I look. I have nightmares about not being able to save you from yours fears. I try to wipe away your tears but you just smile sadly and walk away. Please my love, forgive me. I can’t bear to lose you again. You still hold my heart, even in death.’ Harry cries his heart out in bed after waking from a particularly bad nightmare.
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
‘I’m eating less you know. Our friends are trying to get me to start dating again but I simply can’t. You’re still in my heart, but it hurts so much. It feels like you have abandoned me. Maybe you were never with me to begin with.’ Harry debates, walking to the roof for the last time.
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
“We promised to always comfort each other in our times of need. I need you now. I know you are disappointed in me for not trying harder to live but I can’t. I love you baby and I’m going to come tell you that. I am so sorry I couldn’t save you but I simply can’t go another day without you.” Harry quietly whispers to himself, taking one last look around the Hogwarts grounds. “I am so sorry Draco.” With that whispered statement Harry steps off the roof not to feel the pain ever again.
Epilogue
Harry slowly opens his eyes to see the beautiful molten silver eyes of his love. He starts crying gently thinking he is hallucinating again. He feel two strong arms prop him up then wrap themselves around his back, forcing him to rest his head on the shoulder of the owner of the arms. He sobs silently into the shoulder, not really caring who it is.
“Shh, Harry. Its okay.” He hears a voice that he knows is impossible to be hearing.
He slowly looks up and once again meets the eyes of the one he loves.
“Dragon?” He whispers disbelievingly.
“Yes my angel. Oh Harry, I am so sorry baby.” Draco says, holding Harry close once more.
“But Dray, you died. How can you be here?” Harry asks, confused.
“Oh my angel, I am so sorry! I’m sorry I left you. I watched you every day, wishing I was with you so I could ease your pain!” Draco whispers.
Harry pulls back slightly when he feel wetness on his shoulder, and sees Draco crying.
“Oh, Dray! What’s wrong? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to let you die! I tried so hard! I’m sorry!” Harry tries to pull away and starts crying again, sobs wracking his body.
Draco pulls him back into his embrace, holding Harry to his chest with a death grip around his back. “Harry, no! That’s not it at all! I’m the one who should be sorry! What I’ve been trying to tell you is that thanks to me leaving you are now dead my angel. You should never have had to have suffered so much!”
Harry slowly stops crying and whispers “ But if I’m dead that means I get to be with you for eternity doesn’t it?”
Draco nods slowly then realizing Harry can’t see his head he whispers, “That’s right my angel. But as much as I love you I never would have wanted you to die just to have you with me!”
Harry just lifts his head off Draco’s shoulder and smiles softly saying “ Dragon… Draco… I wanted to be with you again. It was my choice. It was no fault of yours. Now I have a chance to say to you what I never had the courage to say to you while we were alive.”
Harry tilts his head down a bit and seems to be gathering himself slightly before squaring his shoulders and looking up with a small, gorgeous smile of his face and saying confidently and lovingly “Draco, I love you. I have always loved you, even when it was mistaken for hate.”
Draco just seems to stare at Harry for a split second before grinning madly and saying “Oh Harry, my angel, I love you too!”
And so they lived out eternity in each other’s embrace having no need to ever leave it. Taking the time to welcome their friends when they died and greet old companions and family members.
